I hate the fact that I hate my life. Its something I'm currently fighting myself to get over. I have a fucked up view on the world and am too emotionally attached to the people I call friends. I have low self esteem but high confidence. I'm smart. But I don't tend to apply myself. I'm almost always sick and can never seem to get a good nights sleep. I have vivid dreams but I always know when I'm sleeping. My head is in the clouds but I never let my feet leave the ground even for a moment. I hold you hand tighter than you hold mine because I want you to know I care. I speak my mind. I like warm spring days and walking around town with blisters on your feet and little money in your pockets. I like spending time outside. I really enjoy hugs. I text alot. Not because I can't call. I just find it and inconvinience to have to speak. I'm 15 years old and as young as that sounds I am well aware that I really don't have that much time left.



I just wish I knew how to make the most of it.






I think my about me is one of the most insightful things i have written in a while. I realized that I am a sad excuse for the good person I pride myself in being. And I'm sorry. I really, truely am sorry.

I just want to walk. I want to go buy some new shoes and walk some holes into them. I just want to turn my back on everything. Plug in my ipod ,shove my hands in my pockets and just walk away. Gosh, I don't know or care for how long. I just wanna see who will join in stride. Not asking where i'm going or how we'll get there. But someone who will trust me enough to know I know what I'm doing. And wants to take an adventure with me.



I've got a potential 150 dollar job from my grandma :]













ill be just fine.



P.S. Meghan, if you reading.

Do you still like the way I write?